This is most likely old news at this point, but I would still like to talk about it.
Some time ago, a friend of mine sent me a news article that caught my interest. The article spoke of a married man that had openly declared his same gender attraction on his blog (see news article here, and the original blog post he made is here). Such an experience is generally called a ‘coming out’.
Personally, I’ve experienced same gender attraction at least since junior high school. I had no idea what I was experiencing or even had the words to describe what was happening to me. Yet somehow, I thought that the feelings I had were ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’ even though I would never had called the feelings ‘gay’. I pushed on for many years without telling anyone about my feelings of attraction. I do remember praying that they would go away.
It was only on my mission that I finally realized to some degree what was happening. After a very scary confrontation with my first mission president, I was sure I wouldn’t tell anyone else. However, a few months later I had a new mission president who was much kinder and loving with me. After my mission, I learned a new term for what I was experiencing. ‘Same gender attraction’. Finally, I was able to tell my parents, my siblings, and some of my friends.
I started to write my own blog. I was always open about the fact that I had feelings of same gender attraction in my blog, yet I kept it anonymous for many months. After I thought it was the right time, I came out openly on my blog and claimed it as my own blog.
Why do I share this? Being open and honest about me was surprisingly frightening, exciting, and vulnerable. I even struggle with being honest about what kind of game I am in the mood for.
I admire the courage that this man and his wife have shown in being so open about this. I am filled with hope that people that are willing to be open about their struggles and are still willing to live the gospel.
I know that there many men and women of all ages that are struggling in silence with same gender attraction. Many of them may have succumbed to the lie that they cannot both have the feelings and still fully live the gospel. Many may believe that they can’t be happy in this life because of the feelings that they have.
I hope that a blog post like this can help to create an open and loving discussion about the challenge of same gender attraction. I hope that it will encourage those who struggle in silence to reach out for the support they need. I hope that it will help those who have given into despair to find hope. I hope that it will help those who feel they have ‘fallen too far’ to find the healing and redemption that can only be found in the Atonement of Jesus Christ.